February 6th I gave up Facebook. (GASP) Here is how I am still alive...
As expected, I am alive and well. I am also thriving. I am thriving so much that A) I don’t even miss it and B) I won’t be getting it back any time soon. This is not a drill.
There are a few factors that came into play when I decided to delete it. The biggest reason, however, was because it was no longer serving me. The more I continued to open the app, the more anxiety I had, the more disgust I had and it was no longer a place to really go and find community in the way I had hoped it would continue to do.
I was part of a numbers of pages which quickly over the course of a few years, turned into pages of tit for tat, name calling, and demeaning others in the disguise of “just sharing my opinion” or “just trying to help”. The groups became a dumping ground for people to just get dumped on and it categorized as helping or entitlement to have a said opinion. Friends, if you are giving free advice that is underlined with you thinking they are an idiot, you are not helping. You’ve simply just inserted yourself into a space where you don’t belong because you are not coming from a place where you truly want to help for the benefit of them but instead, for the benefit of you to be put on a pedestal to say ”you helped”. You don’t get to help someone for free if it means you are coming from a malicious place.
I was also following people (real people I know) that were also on the negative Nancy program. They would post (no lie) 4-5 times daily about something negative or that they were “having a hard time with” OR better yet, would post just enough where people would hop on the pity party bandwagon to find out about or …once again, “help” with the issue.
Most importantly, I was wasting time and energy away from my goals and my talents that I wasn’t using because I was scrolling through this uselessness. Yes, Becky, I am aware that you haven’t been feeling good for 4 days and ALLL of your friends have been diagnosing you and you STILL refuse to go to the doctor or get anything for it. I have seen it in the wonderful Facebook Algorithm no less than 16 times the last day because thank you, Facebook.
It all started when I was limiting myself on Instagram (which I still do). I took the challenge of 1 hour per day and it started feeling liberating when I was choosing to spend my 1 hour of social media time on Instagram and after that was accomplished, I felt no need to get on Facebook. I really started to realize that it wasn’t serving me in such a way that I wanted to really consume, or better yet, have it available for me to use my time for negativity. But beyond that, when I was on it, I was looking up people and things in my life that I have moved on from and I have grown from just to compare myself to.
My most favorite thing is when people say “I can’t delete it, I stay in touch with so and so.” Well, Pam what did you do before Facebook? Did you pick up the phone, send a text or send snail mail? You can do that again.
Our life is not based around who we follow and who we don’t. Our life is not measured by how many friends we have. Our life is measured by the things we do today to make ourselves better for tomorrow. If people, places, things, apps are not serving you and you find yourself slipping down the slope of hoping on the bandwagon to comment “your opinion” or trolling those who no longer provide meaning to your life, exit. And exit now.